Monday, May 30, 2005

Love, Honor, and Obey

I have received a lot of grief and unwelcome teasing regarding my marriage vows.

To be honest, it has made me really upset at times that something said on a sacred day could be twisted and turned into something negative and to be used to make me feel "less".

The acceptance of subjection does not come easy for me.

Consider my unsaved past. Consider the men that have been in my life before this marriage. Consider my own personality. It is understandable that not very many people would see me as someone who would be willing to 'submit'. There are so many worldly negative connotations that come to mind with the mere typing of the word.

Submit. Obey. Subject.

Do I expect people to understand what those words really mean?
I suppose not.

I have only come to skim the surface of what those words really mean. I have not lived a life of understanding what God wants of me. I am still new to learning. I still wrestle with concepts that have been foreign to me for so many years. But there are times when I embrace those words, because I know what they really mean...and they have nothing to do with being worth less than a man.

Still, it harms me to have this turmoil in my life. I want to shout...this MEANS something to me, don't belittle it.

And maybe it isn't that I expect anyone to understand what it means, but to just honor the fact that it does mean something to me. Because whether or not I understand the things that they do, I still have respect their decisions.

Love, honor, and obey...

Not something to take lightly. And I don't. It isn't easy. In fact it's a daily struggle...but one that God has demanded of me.

Respect that.


At 15:42, Blogger kastrukoff said...

That's really harsh that someone would mock you or tease you about your very own wedding vows. I'm havings a hard time thinking of what would drive a person to do such a thing. It's reallly the type of thing that the "big,loser bully" picks on those who he can. Don't let it get you down PinkDot. The words you spoke that day were much more than mere words to you and your husband, and if someone is not accepting those very words, frankly, they are not accepting you.

You don't have to explain your vows to anyone, you know that. You don't have to defend yourself and your vows. There are always going to be adults who act like children, we can live with that. But, don't live with this. Confront whomever is doing this, even if there is no change, you did what you needed to do.

PinkDot, I'm really starting to like you through you posts. Thanks, once again for keeping me busy for 20 minutes of my boring work day.

At 22:10, Blogger Kassi said...

You are right...I should confront them, and I did let them know that it bothered me. I didn't want my blog to be a passive aggressive forum, and your response woke me to how I handled it. Thank you!

At 17:03, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello, it's amazing how you can get around on these blogs, from person to person, and eventually to strangers. To you, I would be a stranger. But I am walking a similar path as my in-laws are not saved. I too used the words honor and obey in my vows, and I also take them very seriously. I also have past that holds nothing of purity. But it's amazing to slowly learn what God's plan is for women in marriages, and what our roles are. They are so perfect! I feel awful for my in-laws that are missing out on this tremendous blessing of holy marriage. My sister in law is getting married this summer and neither of them are Christians. I myself have only been married one year, so our wedding day is still fresh in my mind. It's difficult for me to find joy in this upcomming day because it lacks so much meaning, so much heart, so much God. But our wedding day was a witness to all our non-christian family, and as was yours, whether you see the fruits of that or not. God has called you yes to honor and obey, but also to witness, to those that are persecuting you. "They will know we are Christians by our love".......I know it's hard to be called down for serving God, but when you react in love, that is the true story of the gospel. Bless you my fellow sister in Christ, in your many endevors of striving for godlyness, He will bless you and honor your heart.


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