Thursday, August 11, 2005

Deadly is the Coffee [Film Noir Style]

It was another day in dullsville, or more specifically, morning paperwork.

My stomach began to whisper to me at 9:30 AM and was screaming at me with the adamance of a Veruca in Willy's Factory by 10:30 AM. With another hour and a half left to go, I knew I was giving in.

Choices were few and far in between, but my stomach knew what it wanted, though my brain resounded with protest. My stomach won, and the next thing I knew I was holding a tall cup of rancid coffee and a 5 month old knock-off-brand of creme-filled chocolate cupcakes from the vending machine.

It was a regret-filled behavior reminiscent of satisfying a craving for McDonald's Big Mac and fries. Unstoppable. Undeniable.

Even as I sipped at the the lukewarm coffee; whose bitterness eminated staunchly, regardless of the valiant but futile attempts of to lessen the sharp stab of black death accosting my palate, with extra cream and sugar... I wondered why why why?

The taste, still clinging to my teeth like tar, my stomach was not deterred. There was still one more cupcake left. My hands and mouth played patsy to an unforgiving stomach as my eyes disbelieved.

The film of grease on the package left by the consumed confection was like picking up an after dinner mint from a bowl that had never been cleaned. I tossed it away, disgusted; with the wrapper...with myself.

Then, like a bad memory that will overcome me later with a feeling of urgency and unease, I tried to forget. But no sooner did I try, was I recalling the sad, sickly taste in my mouth. Something had to be done...

With no other card to play, I called upon a 2-piece serving-sized curiously strong powerhouse.

Ensconced in red and gold regalia, and packing a punch, it was no holds barred. Had I not been the victim I may have felt bad as the piercing taste of cinnamon melted through the rancorous coffee residue like a hot knife to butter. In a matter of seconds my mouth was stinging fresh, and my hands were back to work. The forces of light prevail once more.

Thank you Cinnamon Altoid chewing gum...thank you.

The end

2 Comments:

At 11:54, Blogger AfricaBleu said...

Forget business management - how about advertising, girl?

Hysterical.

 
At 12:00, Blogger Kassi Gilbert said...

Heh, I didn't realize I was writing an Altoids commercial...that IS funny.

 

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